So Apparently Someone Has A New Phone Number...

...but they aren't quite sure what it is. About ten days ago, there was a missed call on my cell phone from a number I didn't recognize. From the prefix, I could tell it was a St. Albans (West Virginia) number...but I don't know anyone who lives in St. Albans.

Over the next several days, I received more of these mystery calls and they all had two things in common. First, I could hardly tell what any of the people were saying. They were all men, they were obviously different people, but none of them enunciated worth a damn. Second, each and every one of them began by asking for someone (whose name I couldn't make out) then, when I told them they had the wrong number, they'd say, "Who's this?!"

My response to that question, when posed by a wrong-number-caller is always the same: "Well...you called me...who are you?" Of course, the caller always responds by mumbling some more, or asking again who I am, so on and so forth, blah, blah, blah, all the while I'm reiterating that, since they called me, perhaps they should confess their identity first.

In the end, when they finally understand that they have called the wrong number, each of these people respond exactly the same way. They hang up on me. Without apology. Without a "thank you." Sometimes they call back. (Heh.) Super geniuses of the universe, these guys.

Two or three nights ago, the St. Albans guy called again...at 3:00 a.m. I had the typical conversation with him, but the shortened middle-of-the-night version that I think ended with me hanging up on him. This special genius called right back so I had Eric answer it. Waking Eric up in the middle of the night with a jerk-ass phone disposition is not a good idea. Eric had some firm words with the guy and then hung up.

So the calls continue. Hopefully, someday the leader of this particular Mensa chapter will realize that s/he's giving out the wrong phone number. Until then, I'm not sure there's much I can do about it.

3 comments:

Spike Nesmith said...

The town I grew up in housed the tax centre for the whole country, and my friends' phone number was one digit off from the tax place's. They got so tired taking calls from people who were too blind/stupid/drunk to dial properly that they had me record an insulting message onto their answering machine along the lines of "[friend] and [friend] aren't in at the moment, so leave a message. And if you thought you were calling the tax centre, maybe you want to invest in a pair of glasses, because you called the wrong number, you moron."

After one of the dial-challenged callers left a pretty graphic threat on their machine, we decided it would probably be best to change the number...

Deadpan Alley said...

When my sister lived in St. Albans, her phone number was one number off from that of CVS. Almost daily she would come home to a message asking about prescription refills.

It got to be such a joke that sometimes I would call and ask, "what time do you close?" And after she got caller ID, if I would call, she would answer the phone, "SEE-VEE-AY-us."

Is there any way you can program this cranky-pants's number into your phone, and assign him a special ring tone? Like no ring tone?

I keep getting calls from a very persistent realtor. I programmed all five of the numbers he calls me from, into my phone, as "Do Not Answer."

Tina said...

I imagine it would not just suck...but really, really suck for my number to be similar to a tax office. People calling were probably already pissed!

And the pharmacy thing would be especially troublesome for me. What if someone left a message for something they really needed that day?

But the "silent" ring tone thing is a great idea! I could even just save them as "Stupid Guy 1," "Stupid Guy 2," etc. Brilliant!