I found out this morning that a certain four-year-old has been having two breakfasts every day and hadn't mentioned it. I didn't notice on the Pre-K schedule that, as opposed to the other kids in school, they have breakfast in their room every morning at 8:15. I'd been feeding her (and the other kids) breakfast at home each morning before school.

So either we don't feed her enough, she eats too much, or she's a Hobbit. Clever, nonetheless, not telling anyone about Second Breakfast.

Initially I had stuck to the hard-line Top Secret concept of Charleston's Underground Kitchen. Hey, you know...some people worked really hard to dream up these surprises and keep them a secret. Turns out, now that this month's installment has taken place, the all clear for spilling the beans has been sounded.

So, in compliance with the e-mail instructions I received on Thursday evening, Saturday evening I dressed, grabbed a bottle of wine from the stash, and headed out the door to Habitat for Humanity's ReStore. Upon arrival, I found a giant, long table adorned with fancy tablecloths, lined with taper candles, and lit from above by simple strings of small white lights (my favorites for any season). The table was centered right in the spacious row containing, among other things, brackets, plastic For Sale signs, and, if I remember correctly, roofing shingles.

Ummm...did I mention that the ReStore is currently non-air-conditioned (and that on my drive there the van's outside temperature reading was reflecting 94 degrees)? One would think that in my dark jeans and black t-shirt (my new favorite one that blessedly does not hug the midsection), I would have been a candidate for passing out. The building had some good airflow, though, thanks to a ginormous, strategically-placed fan, and was actually not that hot. One of the ReStore people in attendance did say that they're getting air conditioning right now.

So, as the other 29 guests strolled in, I was surprised to see that I didn't know as many as I thought I would. One of my best friends strolled in as the same-sex-hetero-date of another one of my friends that I gained when I started attending book club but, other than that, I had met just one or two of the guests around town. I pre-hydrated with my Vitamin Water and Stoli (yes, it's delicious) while waiting for our seating cards to be distributed so that we weren't placed too close to people we knew.

When I did locate my designated chair, I was seated between two men: an attorney from a local firm I had actually met a few days earlier at my kids' school's Local School Improvement Council meeting, and an attorney from the Dark Side (a defense attorney). I KID, I kid. Everyone deserves a defense I guess. Across from me was a beautiful young accountant who grew up with a friend of mine who now lives in Washington, D.C., a local art dealer with wonderful dark hair (that highlighted her sparkly eyes) and gorgeous artsy jewelry, and a friendly, funny business consultant that I know I've seen around town for years but just never met (whose grandmother had 20 children!!). Oh! I also met a young photographer (eh...one of those people with a gift for looking 22 forever but who was actually almost 30). He was good-natured about my amateur photog groupie-ness and gave me a few tips about shooting digital. To me he looked a lot like Orlando Bloom but I'm not sure why.

So here's where I might get in trouble with Mr. DT. I can't remember what all the food was called. For one thing, I'm not sure it stayed on my plate long enough for me to absorb the name. Anyway, you can soon get the recipes here (if you see the picture of asparagus it's not been updated yet). I remember that the appetizers were curry chicken salad and a really refreshing spread on a pita slice (which looked like very smooth guacamole and tasted very minty). Dinner included a very light, white fish, something else spectacular that had orzo and corn in it, something deliciously like a salsa, and a little dab of soft cheese. Dessert was a chilled apple soup with walnuts and light spices. The wine was varied as it was brought along by each guest. I had a red table wine and then a Merlot, both of which were very good.

For four really fun hours I talked with the people surrounding me about light issues like children, education, social justice, politics, and religion. (Yes, we talked about politics and religion and there was no rumble. You just have to know when you're in the right company. And for clarification, I use the term "rumble" usually like in West Side Story or The Outsiders and not like thunder.) The more serious conversations involved topics like Scrabble (of course!) the online Webkinz universe, the delightfully-ridiculous Sean Connery character on SNL. And...yes, I know I talk about SC on CJ on SNL all the time but it cracks me up just thinking about it. (What's the difference between you and a mallard with a cold? One's a sick duck and I can't remember how it ends, but your mother's a whore.)

And by the time I pushed my chair back and headed out the door, it was 11:00. Time had certainly flown by on the wave of good company and frequent laughter. (Did I just mix my metaphors? You bet. I also eat my dinner in secret places so...)

Pretty cool, you think? Yes. Pretty cool. I mean, each and every day we can pay a decent sum of money, sit down to a dinner with our friends, talk about the things we love to talk about, and eat food we know we love...and maybe get a little drunk. At least for now, we have the chance to occasionally dine in a really unique place, get to know other people who appreciate the coolness of dining in such a place, eat some absolutely delicious food, and get a little drunk.

And, finally, a word about the location sponsor. If you have never visited ReStore (this one or one in your town), do so right away. Even if you're not building or remodeling a home, there is a constantly-changing stock of unique treasures, practical materials and antiques that you will either use or just love. The money spent at ReStore helps realize Habitat for Humanity's mission of providing people with decent, affordable, healthy housing. And whether you're undertaking a major remodel of your home, or just changing out an older light fixture, ReStore will gladly add the materials you don't need anymore to their inventory.

(P.S. I had taken some pretty cool pictures of the table and settings but because I'm the Super Genius of the Universe, I failed to take them on a camera with any storage at that moment.)

But, unfortunately, I cannot.

I can tell you that tonight I dined at Charleston's own Underground Kitchen...a social concept dinner party in its second month. The quick run down (and if you want the less quick run down, click the link above), is that the UK is a dinner where you don't know the other guests, you don't know what you're going to eat, and you don't even know where you're going to eat. (The day before the dinner you receive the Top Secret information about the location but that is all.)

Here's what I can divulge:

I had my dinner and drinks at a long, long table with about 30 other people. The seating placements were random in that they were meant to get strangers to talk to each other but planned in that people who already knew each other were separated as much as possible. I dined on a three-course gourmet meal prepared by chefs whose names shall not be spoken. I had delightful, thoughtful, and interesting conversation with unique people. I can tell you that we talked about light topics like civil rights, discrimination, education, and art, and very serious things like Scrabble and Sean Connery on SNL Celebrity Jeopardy (Swords!!). In the end, for a modest price plus a bottle of wine for the communal table, I had four hours of great food, great people, and great conversation.

And I can tell you this: as long as this fun and unique dining experience continues, I will be there (unless, of course, it conflicts with my very important Scrabble schedule).

Click here for the updated version of the night.

Last month, Charleston's first (as far as I know) Underground Kitchen made its debut. What is Underground Kitchen? It's not a restaurant...it's more of a concept. The concept? Serve a fabulous dinner to two or three dozen people, with a secret menu, and a surprise location to be revealed to the guests the day before. The identities of the guests are kept secret and, also, you're not allowed to sit with whomever you came.

Sound socially-awkward, scary, or potentially hazardous to your picky taste buds? Put your minds at ease!! Only the very coolest people would attend a dinner party with so many elements of surprise...and last time the cuisine consisted of: Seared ‘Steak’ Medallions with Plum Sauce over Scallion Parmesan Polenta; Grilled Asparagus Spears and Prosciutto with Honey-Mint-Goat Cheese Spread; Bruschetta with Wild Mushrooms, Tomato, Madeira & Asiago; and Fruited Couscous Salad with Tarragon, Citrus & Buttermilk Dressing. Doesn't that sound just awesome?

So last month I was otherwise-scheduled. This month, I've already bought and paid for my ticket! Last I heard, though, there were only about five tickets not requested for July...but there are about a dozen not yet paid for. You can still snag one of those unrequested tickets (and pay for it to secure your seat) or, if there aren't any of those left, you can let your evil side run wild and snatch a ticket up anyway (by paying).

So, friends...come on over and have dinner with me and the other cool people I know will be there (because they're the cooks). Although I can't yet give a first-hand report, I seriously don't think you'll be disappointed.

I'm sorry about the title, but I just had to say it. I've been watching Saturday Night Live since I was way too young to watch Saturday Night Live so trust me when I say that there's not much that's funnier than bodily functions. (See also Annuale.)

On a related note, my firm does many great things for its employees...one of which includes having a big selection of fresh fruit brought in every week from the Purple Onion at the Capitol Market. Yes, we are special. (We also have bottled water with the firm's name on it.) So, if you're busy busy busy and don't have time for lunch or are just uninspired by the selections within walking distance, you can grab some fruit and some very special bottled water and just keep working.

I also keep less-perishable food in my desk drawer (like milk and beef). Okay...actually, I keep almonds and cereal in there. Today, I had All-Bran Complete Wheat Flakes and an apple for lunch...and I read the cereal box while I was eating. All-Bran has 1 gram of soluble fiber and 4 grams of insoluble fiber per tiny, unrealistically-sized, 3/4-cup serving. Hmm. "What's the difference?" I asked myself and set about finding out.

Turns out, eating a lot of fiber is something akin to drinking a lot of poison. Apparently one must work your way up from, say...a flake of All-Bran every day, and develop an immunity to certain health hazards like "dramatically swollen belly," "smelly office syndrome," and such. It's like that guy who injected himself with a little snake venom over and over for a long time so he could handle them without suffering a fatal bite.

But don't you worry, my friends...I've always had only two preferences when it came to cereal: Wood Fiber Health Flakes or Lucky Charms. My tolerance to fiber has been in place for a long time...and I stay away from Lucky Charms as much as possible because they're so delicious I could eat a whole box. (In all fairness, All-Bran is very delicious, as well, and very satisfying for a meal.)

For the rest of you, be warned. All-Bran may be good for your heart, but the more you eat the more you will...be healthy.